How Stress Impacts Intimate Relationships

Ok so by now we know that stress affects us physically, mentally and emotionally, but did you know that when our stress levels soar, it’s not just us, the stressed individual who suffers - it's our relationships who unfortunately can bear the brunt of this silent force? When we feel under the pump, or overwhelmed, we may find ourselves withdrawing emotionally, communicating less, or even lashing out at loved ones, without understanding why. Over time, these small shifts in our communication and behaviour, can create a growing distance between us and people who we once shared deep connections with.

What happens when we're stressed, is that our body unconsciously triggers the ‘flight, fight, freeze or fawn’ response, activating the body’s stress hormones like cortisol. While this is helpful in emergencies, chronic stress keeps this response activated, causing irritability, fatigue, and emotional numbness. These symptoms often manifest in relationships as short tempers, miscommunication, or lack of intimacy. Without intervention, or awareness, the effects that stress causes on our behaviours, can be devastating on our relationships.

How Stress Changes Us

Under stress, we become more reactive than thoughtful, which means that sometimes our patience runs thin, and we might snap at our loved ones over minor issues. Alternatively, stress can cause us to withdraw as we attempt to manage the overwhelming feelings alone, leaving those near to us feeling neglected or unimportant. This creates a toxic cycle where miscommunication and emotional distance deepen, reinforcing feelings of isolation for both us, and our loved ones. Furthermore, chronic stress takes a toll on physical health, leading to a decrease in energy, sleep disturbances, and even depression. As a result, intimacy and affection often take a backseat, which further strains the relationship.

Restoring Balance: Stress Management as the Key

The good news is, stress doesn't have to define your relationship’s future. With the right self-care stress management techniques, and awareness of your stress triggers and stress reactions, you can break the stress cycle.

In times of stress, talking openly with your partner is essential, acknowledging that stress is affecting your behavior, and express a willingness to work through it together. So if your partner has expressed that they are currently coping with overwhelm or stress, simple acts of empathy, like listening actively, can provide the emotional connection that they desperately need to not feel so alone.

Remember: A little self-care help goes a long way, and the sooner you act, the sooner you’ll see the positive changes in your life and relationships.

Research: Intimate Relationships in Context: Stress Spillover, Relationship Efficacy, and Relationship Satisfaction

Rosanna Commisso - Founder, StressCare Solutions

Championing Workplace Wellbeing | Mental Health & Trauma Advocate

As the Founder of StressCare Solutions, my passion for helping organisations navigate the growing challenge of stress and trauma in the workplace, is personal.

With over 30-years’ experience spanning health, training and community services, and my own lived experience with mental health, burnout and trauma—I bring both professional insight and ‘lived experience’ understanding to my work.

My mission is simple: to empower organisations, and their staff, with the tools they need to recognise, manage, and reduce stress before it leads to burnout, and to implement trauma-informed practices to support their staff.

Through engaging, evidence-based workshops, impactful speaking engagements, and trauma-informed workplace support, I help teams build resilience, improve wellbeing, and thrive.

Let’s build healthier workplaces—together.

📩 rosanna@stresscare.com.au | 🌐 www.stresscare.com.au