Let's Be Real - Authenticity & Stress Resilience

What does being authentic really mean, and why is it such a powerful force in building resilience against stress?

According to the Cambridge dictionary, authenticity is defined as ‘the quality of being real or true’.

For me, being authentic refers to being who I truly am - without pretense or the masks society expects us to wear. It means speaking my truth, living my life in alignment with my core values of: honesty, transparency, integrity, and freedom. And yes, it’s certainly not an easy thing to do as sometimes it means challenging societal norms and then having to deal with the backlash and consequences of going against the grain.

 We live in a world where there are lots of unspoken rules that we are expected to live by - telling us not to ‘rock the boat’, to ‘keep our head down’ and not ‘challenge the status quo’. And if we fail to abide by these expectations, we're labelled a ‘rebel’, the ‘black sheep’ or a ‘trouble maker’.

So, we comply because we want to fit in, to be accepted.

We stay quiet rather than asking questions when something doesn’t feel right or when we have something to say. We follow paths - going right with everyone else, when in our heart we truly want to go left - because we’re too afraid to divert from what is expected of us. We sweep upsetting issues under the carpet, or put our head in the sand and pretend everything is ok, because it’s so much easier than dealing with the potential fall out of doing things differently, but deep down our body, intuition, heart, know that something isn’t right.

We ignore our own needs, believing that others’ needs are more important, or worse, that caring for ourselves is selfish.

As you can now guess, living an authentic life, isn’t always easy.

I have a confession: I haven’t always lived authentically. For most of my life, I didn’t have the courage to speak my truth. I hid behind a facade, ashamed of the struggles I faced—mental health issues, trauma, PTSD, even thoughts of suicide. I was convinced that something was wrong with me because my life didn’t fit society's picture-perfect narrative. It’s hard to admit, but I felt broken, defective, less than.

But the main reason I was unable to be me - be authentic, was because I didn’t even know who I was. I had no idea what my values were or what I truly believed in. Because society didn’t seem to care about these questions I had no roadmap to guide me, and no idea how to find the answers.

The path to authenticity hasn’t been easy – unfortunately, I had to reach rock bottom where the only options were ‘sink or swim’. It took everything I had—endless inner work, countless moments of doubt and tremendous fear.

If you've ever faced something similar, you know what it’s like. It’s the ‘Hero’s Journey’, as described by Joseph Campbell. You leave one version of yourself behind and return transformed. But there’s no guarantee of success—it’s a risk you take. But, if you make it through, the journey will change you forever.

 When you’ve been in the dark trenches, faced your inner demons, and come through to the other side, you accept nothing less than living a life of integrity, truth and authenticity that supports your personal worth. Nothing becomes more important than inner peace and surrounding yourself with people who truly have your best interest at heart.

Society teaches us that our worth is tied to external things: our jobs, our relationships, our possessions. We believe that these define us, that without them, we are nothing.

So, what do we do when everything that defined us, is gone? Who are we then?

Here's the truth I’ve discovered: when we base our value on external things, we give away our personal power. The answer, I believe, lies in redefining our value. True value comes from within. No matter what life throws our way, no one can take our inner self from us. Life may shake us, but when we’ve anchored ourselves in who we truly are, we stand firm. For me, that solid foundation comes from living authentically.

I love the saying, ‘wherever you go, there you are.’

It reminds me that no matter how much we try to change our circumstances - job, relationships, surroundings—if we haven’t learned to cultivate a loving relationship with ourself, nothing outside of us will ever be enough. We can try to escape or change everything else, but wherever we go, we bring ourself along – there is no running away.

This may sound bleak, but actually it's quite empowering, as sometimes we just can't change the situation we find ourself in, but we always have the power to change how we respond.

For me, living authentically means knowing who I am. It means trusting that in any situation, I’ve got my own back. And let me tell you: there is no greater feeling than knowing you’re on your own side, that nothing or no one can disturb your inner peace or your self-respect.

Perhaps you might want to ask yourself:

•  What does being authentic look like for me?

• Are there situations—whether in my job, my relationships, or elsewhere—where I find it difficult to be authentic? Why?

•  What might happen if I started being authentic - speaking my truth, in these situations?

•  Whose life am I living?

 Authenticity isn’t just about being true to yourself; it’s a practice that builds a foundation of stress resilience that can carry you through life’s most challenging moments. And remember, the journey to discovering your true self is worth every step. So speak out - be real!

Rosanna Commisso - Founder, StressCare Solutions

Championing Workplace Wellbeing | Mental Health & Trauma Advocate

As the Founder of StressCare Solutions, my passion for helping organisations navigate the growing challenge of stress and trauma in the workplace, is personal.

With over 30-years’ experience spanning health, training and community services, and my own lived experience with mental health, burnout and trauma—I bring both professional insight and ‘lived experience’ understanding to my work.

My mission is simple: to empower organisations, and their staff, with the tools they need to recognise, manage, and reduce stress before it leads to burnout, and to implement trauma-informed practices to support their staff.

Through engaging, evidence-based workshops, impactful speaking engagements, and trauma-informed workplace support, I help teams build resilience, improve wellbeing, and thrive.

Let’s build healthier workplaces—together.

📩 rosanna@stresscare.com.au | 🌐 www.stresscare.com.au